In a Spongebob Squarepants cartoon, Spongebob gets up one morning and thinks he’ll create a fantastic dessert for himself. Unfortunately, his choice of ingredients cause him to have horrific halitosis (bad breath). Spongebob proceeds to go outside, where he meets several people, all of whom scream and run away from him as soon as he opens his mouth and says, “Hello.”

His conclusion – “I must be terribly ugly!”

Based on his erroneous conclusion, he weighs all evidence only in light of his conclusion (scotoma) – and discounting evidence to the contrary. Every experience he encounters only tends to strengthen his belief that he is ugly rather than stinky. His scotoma causes him to feel less and less self-confident until he at last introverts and avoids others.

Spongebob’s close friend, Patrick, who as a starfish, has no nose, can’t smell the bad breath and so assumes his friend is correct in his assumption that he is ugly. Together, Spongebob and Patrick attempt to overcome the “ugliness” through a series of humorous, yet reasonable, methods. They try positive affirmations, “I’m ugly and I’m proud!” etc. Again, all their efforts are aimed at correcting what they believe to be the fundamental problem – that Spongebob is ugly.

At long last Patrick tries some of Spongebob’s “dessert” and finds that he, too, has become “ugly.” Everyone runs away from them whenever they open their mouths. When Patrick then speaks to Spongebob and Spongebob gets a whiff of the odorous mouth, he finally gets it that he’s not ugly – his breath stinks – and together Spongebob and Patrick celebrate the fact that “we stink!”

This is a fine example of what happens when we make an erroneous conclusion from the data we observe. Compounding the problem of erroneous conclusions is that we make many of our life-determining decisions based on data we evaluated and made conclusions on when we were VERY YOUNG or in our infancy – a time in our lives when we were physically and psychologically poorly equipped to make such conclusions. Further, we did not have sufficient data to make such life-determining conclusions. And so we find ourselves living our lives based on erroneous conclusions of ambiguous data (life experience) we made long ago – so long ago we don’t recall them – but we are living them out nevertheless.

So, what do we do about it? How do I become aware of that of which I am unaware. I’m even so unaware that I’m unaware that I’m unaware. Egad!

Here’s what I recommend:

Develop a healthy skepticism about your own decisions and decision making processes. Question yourself often, “Am I sure about this?” “Could I be wrong about this/that/them/you/me/us?” etc.

LISTEN to those closest to you. Consider criticism as golden nuggets of awareness about that which you are unaware. Spouses especially are goldmines for such info. Especially if you feel threatened – the surest sign that gold is afoot. Defending yourself against your loved ones shuts the doors and windows of awareness.

LISTEN to your “enemies” – they will tell you what you don’t want to hear. As such, they can be your best friends – at least when it comes to information about you. You don’t have to give in or give up – just pay attention. “Could what they say about me be true – to some extent?”

Speak the words, “Thank you” to those you feel are attacking you. Be genuine – no sarcasm or brushing off. They are doing you a favor – it’s just good manners to show appreciation. Besides, it shifts your thinking mode from emotion to reason – a good thing during communication.

Deal with your emotional triggers. I recommend you get help with them – to avoid missing those that hide from you. Seek out a therapist who works holistically – treating the entire being – someone skilled in rooting out those hidden emotional “secrets” that come forward when triggered.

A leading hospital says up to a third of the children it treats for certain conditions are ill because their parents smoke around them.

Dr Steve Ryan, Medical Director of Liverpool’s Alder Hey Hospital, says bronchitis, asthma and ear infections could be cut if parents quit smoking.

He said parents often lied about whether they smoke near their children. The British Lung Foundation says 17,000 under-fives are treated every year for exposure to second-hand smoke.

Speaking to BBC Radio Five Live, he said out of the 35,000 children the hospital treats every year, 2,000 are there because they have been exposed to their parents’ smoke.

He said between a quarter and a third of those suffering from certain conditions such as chest infections and asthma were the victims of passive smoking.

High Intensity

Parents often know the health implications of smoking around their children, he added. “People feel guilty,” he told BBC News. “If it was easy, they would give up. Looking after children is good fun but it can be stressful and for some, cigarettes are a way of relieving that stress.”

He does not think legislation is the answer but believes parents should be aware of the various levels of risk.

The top level, he said, was parents smoking in cars, where children were “trapped” and exposed to a “high intensity” of fumes. Mothers smoking is a greater risk than fathers smoking, and smoking in the same room as your child is also high risk, he added. “Having smoke on your clothes is a lower risk,” he said.

“But a good tip for parents is always put on another layer of clothes when smoking outside. Our staff are made to put a coat on when they go out to smoke during their breaks.”

Medical conditions

Amanda Sandford from smoking campaign group Ash said an estimated half of all children are exposed to smoke in the home. “It is clearly a widespread problem and I don’t think people realize that so many children are regularly breathing in smoke,” she said. “About a quarter of adults smoke and there are more among young adults, people between 25-34, the age at which they are more likely to be parents with younger children.” She added that now smoking was banned in enclosed public places, parents should treat their home like the workplace, and smoke outside.

Research published in 2005 suggested children exposed to their parents’ smoking were three times more likely to develop lung cancer later in life. The government’s independent Scientific Committee on Tobacco and Health concluded in 2004 that exposure to second-hand smoke can cause a number of serious medical conditions, including lung cancer, heart disease and childhood respiratory disease.

Banging the Drum

Martin Birchall, an Ear Nose and Throat (ENT) surgeon and professor at Bristol University, said: “Passive smoking at home, exposing children to smoke they cannot escape from, increases the risk of them getting ear disease, sticky runny noses and sore throats, and further down the track, some of these ENT symptoms can in due course led on to worse diseases such as asthma.”

He added: “We need to keep banging the drum. We need to publicize the fact that every cigarette you smoke is a cigarette that your child is smoking also.” A Department of Health spokesperson said: “Second-hand smoke kills. We must continue to help people understand the dangers of second-hand smoke, especially for the health of their children.”

If you are ready to call it quits on smoking – and want to stop and stay stopped, I recommend that you purchase my book, “You Can Stop Smoking and Stay Stopped Forever” – available at 1derworks.com and Amazon.com.

Adapted from BBC news release

Basically, when you suppress an emotion, you still feel it and your body must account for the increased chemical activity – usually resulting in illness or later increased emotional expression. On the other hand, re-evaluation of the judgment one gives their experience tends to significantly decrease the chemical activity of emotional brain areas – and leads to far less emotional expression later.

I recommend the same for men as well. When you feel angry for whatever reason, if you will take a step back in your mind, disengage with the object of your anger, and reconsider your judgments about it, you may find that you’ll feel better. And even more importantly, you’ll feel better later.

Perhaps the greatest emotion generating judgment we have is the need to be right. The energy we expend on our crusades rivals those of the middle ages – often giving us similar results: less energy overall, impoverished relationships, and overall poorer health. It’s wise and prudent to reconsider your positions in relation to others. It may be okay for more than one person to be right. It may be okay to let someone else have their opinion.

If you find you’re having trouble reconsidering your judgments, you might find value in a therapy like Rapid Eye Technology, EFT, hypnosis, or CBT.

According to the newest figures from the 2007 National Health Interview Survey (NHIS), an annual study in which tens of thousands of Americans are interviewed about their health- and illness-related experiences, developed by the National Center for Complementary and Alternative Medicine (NCCAM), a part of the National Institutes of Health (NIH) and the National Center for Health Statistics (NCHS), a part of the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC), approximately 38 percent of adults in the United States aged 18 years and over and nearly 12 percent of U.S. children aged 17 years and under use some form of complementary and alternative medicine (CAM).

That’s a lot of therapy outside the mainstream of “traditional” American medicine. According to the survey, most of the care was for pain. The higher the level of education and socioeconomic level, the more likely the use of CAM. As CAM is rarely covered by US insurance carriers, more wealthy people are more likely to be able to afford such care.

No statistics for effectiveness were released, but it is obvious to me that the sheer numbers speak for themselves. US insurance carriers are missing a huge chunk of the overall patient care picture by not covering CAM. The US is so far behind most other first world countries in the medical care of its citizens it just screams out for reform. Nowhere else in the world are supposedly free people treated so poorly medically as we are in the US, generally speaking.

It comes as no surprise to those who are currently uninsured or under-insured, that fully one in four US citizens have none or inadequate access to medical treatment. Those fortunate enough to have the means to buy insurance, are usually treated to a policy that excludes effective CAM treatments. A few avant gard carriers do include a small number of CAM sessions when ordered by one of their participating physicians. And, although physician referrals restrict access somewhat, it is perhaps the most reasonable way to ensure adequate care.

In the end, however, I’d like to see a universal healthcare package similar to that which the French enjoy – where everyone has access and proven CAM therapies are included in the deal. Unfortunately, greed reigns more than sense in the US when it comes to health care and I doubt I’ll see universal health care in the US in my lifetime.

Compassionate Healing, A Surrogate Approach – Based on years of  seminar presentations on the subject of proxy healing.

Surrogate (or Proxy) Healing uses a person’s own judgments and perceptions to heal. It is the secret “Back Door” to your most powerful healing faculties.

As you become more skilled in the use of surrogacy, you will discover untapped potential for individual and planetary healing unimagined otherwise.

In this book, you’ll learn how to turn the negative emotions and energies of others into a beneficial force – until all are healed and the world awakens into the light of real physical, emotional, and mental health.

This book presents fundamentals and specific methods and tactics for surrogate or proxy healing.

Healers, learn how you can affect change in resistant clients, help clients more easily heal their relationship problems, turn troubled teens into super-healers, speed healing after surgery, and much more using this amazing attribute of the human mind.

You can apply the techniques offered in this book to any healing modality and to yourself personally. You may use the technique to amplify empathy and thereby help resolve many issues in the process.

As you tune in to the feelings of others, you will develop a broader understanding and sense of responsibility for your world – a key attribute to healthy joyful living – and the essence of compassionate healing.

Surrogate or proxy healing is the concept that one person can stand in place of another. One person receives healing processes for and in behalf of another. That other can be a person, group, animal, plant – there is no limit. For example, an owner can do healing processes for and in behalf of her pet.

Essentially, surrogate or proxy healing is an exercise in pure compassion.

Surrogate healing presents both client and healer a probability of deep core belief transformation by accessing the deepest core beliefs and bypassing mental and emotional protection instincts.

Dr. Randolph C. Byrd, a cardiologist, created a stir in medical circles when he had volunteers pray daily for one group of patients in the coronary care unit at San Francisco General Medical Center. A second group of heart disease patients served as a control group. Although neither the patients nor their doctors knew who got the prayers, those in the prayed-for group were five times less likely to require antibiotics and were less apt to need ventilators to help them breathe. Southern Medical Journal 1988 Jul; 81(7): 826-9

A surrogate session can be done rather quickly and effectively using therapeutic techniques and processes with an underlying understanding of the concept and using the simple outline in this book.

Compassionate Healing, A Surrogate Approach is available at CreateSpace.

How many times have you heard or seen on TV the glowing reports of some miracle drug that is supposed to cure what ails you? And, along with the report/advertisement is a long list of side effects and possible conflicts with other meds or conditions. “Side effects include… [long list of sometimes life-threatening side effects]…” An example of serious side effects are those found with usage of anticonvulsant medications that may be associated with increased risk of suicide*.

The reason we can’t just “make a pill for that” is because we don’t yet understand enough about the physical body to interact with it in unnatural ways – like medication – without disturbing a functioning system (even when that system is mal-functioning).

I am SO grateful that we have medications for so many things that used to kill folks young (well, younger than me, anyway!). Without “miracle” drugs, those with a ruptured appendix would have died instead of recovered. The flu would have killed millions each year. Smallpox, polio, dengue and other deadly diseases would run rampant and decimate humanity. We owe much to the pharmaceutical industry.

On the “flip side” we have holistic medicine that for the most part has no side effects at all. Of course, in some cases, it offers little real benefit, too. Unfortunately, those of us with little education into holistic practices are at the mercy of marketing – just as we are with pharmaceuticals. The difference is that in the West, big pharma markets its products through a network of trusted providers – the medical establishment. We in the West don’t view holistic practitioners as trusted resources like do our medical physicians.

When I go to the hospital for an operation, I don’t want a fellow waving a willow branch over me pronouncing me “cured”. I want results in the way I have come to believe – according to my cultural training. Never mind the effectiveness of the willow branch waving. I’m unlikely to even give it a go if my medical doctor says it’s hokum.

Basically, I’d rather die being right than live being wrong.

I’d rather kill myself with side effects and hope my medication does what I expect it to (man, that headache went right away when I took my aspirin for it) – than to try out voodoo or mysticism or a Wicca spell or any other form of alternative [to drug] therapy my doctor (who works for the “industry”) says is not worthwhile. My physician is biased by the system s/he works for – but I’m okay with that… apparently.

Years ago, I worked with a rather unorthodox physician who referred some of his patients to me for hypnotherapy and Rapid Eye Technology. He almost lost his license to practice medicine because of his interest in offering his patients alternatives to pharmaceuticals. Instead of losing his license, however, he was forced to take “classes” in remedial note taking – along with the installation of a computerized medical record-keeping program monitored by the State. He was brought “in line” with State regulations… and I received far fewer referrals.

Next time you visit your pharmacy for one of those “miracle” drugs, look over the contraindications and other warnings – usually in extremely small print so as to fit onto one LONG page. Feel grateful that science has given you such amazing products. Then look into alternatives – perhaps something holistic that might prevent you from having to use the “miracle” drug in the first place.

Holistic and allopathic medicine have their places and complement each other nicely. In a world awash in information, however, I still find it difficult to sort through the detritus to know which and when to use for what ails me…

*Source: Journal of the American Medical Association

Audio Interview (podcast):

See original podcast at http://www.pbs.org/wnet/need-to-know/uncategorized/manufacturing-mental-illness/1787/

I believe Dr. Ramachandran is describing the essence of compassion. It’s scientific!

“Even a dog knows the difference between being kicked and being stumbled over.” — Oliver Wendell Holmes

And so, it seems do toddlers. A study out of Queen’s University has demonstrated that children as young as 21 months can differentiate the intentions of those around them.

Psychology professor Valerie Kuhlmeier and PhD student Kristen Dunfield found that toddlers are more likely to help someone who has made an effort to help them, even if that person was unable to accomplish the toddler’s desired outcome. In a series of three experiments, the researchers discovered that it was the thought that counted for the toddlers, not the end result.

What does this mean to those of us who are past our toddler stage? (a purely subjective call in my case at least)

I think it means that clients investigating early childhood “memories” (in hypnosis, for example), might be served to also investigate the intentions of those around them. This can easily be accomplished through surrogate or proxy healing in which the client/subject imagines being the other person involved in the early childhood event(s) being investigated. In Rapid Eye Technology it is common for RET Technicians to invoke proxy, especially during the Inner Child Stages work to capture the thoughts of those around the client during early childhood – I recommend to RET Technicians that they focus some attention to the intentions of those others rather than just on what they thought or did.

“Intention is everything.” (might be truer than we think)

Study source: Psychological Science

In a study published by Psychological Science, a journal of the Association for Psychological Science, researchers discovered that feedback given earlier in learning sessions tend to bring about better grades over the long haul and improve students’ performance overall.

I’ve found this same phenomenon in hypnotherapy and Rapid Eye Technology sessions. When clients discovered early on that the process I was using was working, they tended to get better results overall – achieving therapeutic goals quicker and with far less effort. When clients believed it would take several sessions to show improvement, they tended to go slower and often struggled to make progress. Conversely, when clients felt immediate results (positive feedback) they tended to feel more successful and confident with the processes we used.

In hypnotherapy we call it a “convincer” – that is, a sort of “test” in which the subject feels that what they are doing they are doing successfully (“you’ll notice now that you cannot open your eyes no matter how hard you try…”). The end result of a successful convincer is deeper somnambulism and more effective hypnotherapy. In effect, the subject invokes the placebo effect and makes the therapy work better overall.

I’ve believed all along (and is borne out by years of experience) that clients who believe their therapy is working are more likely to succeed with the therapy. I’ve also experienced the phenomenon that clients who believe early on that the therapy is working will make the most dramatic strides toward their therapeutic goals.

My goal in the first session was to do like fire fighters do with large blazes – knock down the “big stuff” – and then mop up afterward. That way, the client quickly builds belief in the process through early success – and then sticks with it to “clean up”. In the process, the client gets to enjoy rapid change in the direction of their choice – while belief in the therapeutic process gives them added value and power later during the “clean up” phase.

If you are a therapist, even in a socialized environment where you get paid the same regardless of client outcome, I recommend rapidly building client belief in whatever system you’re using. The overall length of therapy can be years – yet if the client/patient believes the system works for them, they will feel successful throughout their time of treatment/therapy.

If you’re a client/patient, wouldn’t you want your therapy to work for you? Of course you would! That’s why you sought therapy in the first place. And wouldn’t you want that therapy to work FASTER rather than SLOWER? Yes! And in most of my cases as a therapist, clients preferred the “knock down then clean up” method better than the “you’ll see results after 12 sessions” approach.

Rapid Eye Technicians, especially, if they follow the outline taught by the Rapid Eye Institute will generally see rapid results. However, since Rapid Eye Technology is not designed to be a “knock down clean up afterward” kind of model, you may have to invoke some convincers early on to accomplish the early positive feedback model. NO CHANGE in practice of the RET process is necessary to achieve this – just a slight change to how you address the client during their first session. Here’s how I did it when I was in practice:

• Within seconds of the wand moving and the eyes blinking, I’d give feedback – “Very good. I can see by your rapidly pulsing pupils that this is definitely working for you…” or “Good! You’re reacting to the process even more rapidly than I expected…” or “Excellent! I can feel the difference in your energy already…” etc. VERY positive feedback VERY early on.
• Make ALL observations invoke the placebo effect by attributing physical changes to successful therapy – “See? Your face is smoothing out… this (RET) is working VERY well for you…” etc.
• Invoke a convincer. This works best AFTER the client has released something heavy – “Now, just TRY to bring back that feeling of fear you just told me about before we started doing RET on it…” When they can’t recall the feeling, their convinced the process works – and will work even better now that they are convinced.
• Make the first session the BEST session. Of course they will have even better sessions later because clients tend to get better at RET the more they use it – but in this case I’m talking about PERCEPTION rather than reality. At the close of their first session you could say something like, “Now that you’ve knocked down the major emotional load of all this, I look forward to cleaning up the little pockets of ‘stuff’ that we didn’t quite get to today…” (giving the PERCEPTION that you took the majority of the load off in that first session – and sending them home even more hopeful and excited about their next few sessions with you)

If you are a client/patient, I recommend that you let yourself BELIEVE that you’ve knocked down the major emotional load in your first session. Reward yourself for your success early on by focusing on and noticing how WELL the therapy is working for you.

Knock the blaze down in the first session and mop up afterward – easy and effective.

Study Source: Barbara Isanski, Association for Psychological Science